Life Changes

So much going on here.

Although, my usual feeling of being overwhelmed doesnt really affect me like it used to.

I guess thats a good thing.

I seem to have a better handle on things. My outlook has changed. My attitude has changed. My thoughts have changed. My life has changed - but deep down I know I am still the same person that I always was - yet I feel different.

I know - confusing - Im still trying to figure out how that is possible too.

Last year proved to be the one of the most difficult times in my life. I had very little help or support until after it was all over and people started to see for themselves what I had been going thru.

I had a lot of things to face that I was terrified to even consider thinking about.

Looking back now - after Ive gone thru it - I dont know what I was so scared of. Sure, a lot of what happened was in fact scarier than I could ever imagine, but it shouldnt have paralyzed me the way it did. NOTHING or NO ONE should ever do that. I stayed frozen for many years. TOO many years. I hope I learned enough from it and about myself so that it never happens again.

I did learn that if you arent happy - you shouldnt just wallow in that feeling.

So now, I am currently looking to move.

Yep - Im selling this house.

Its time.

And Im scared.....but not like before. Ive made major changes in my life. This has to change too now.

Ive been looking at homes here in NJ for a while and last week I took a trip to North Carolina to look around. Ive never been to NC. A lot of my family has re-located there and they have been raving about it. They love it and swear they'd never move back to NJ. So I figured hey - what the hell?

So we went.

It was really nice. The homes are so different style-wise. Beautiful, open airy floor plans. Lots of light. I love that.

However, I fell in LOVE with a big old "georgian-style" mansion. It is actually a historic home built in 1904 that has been on the market for over 3 years. Lots of possibilities. It was GORGEOUS! A little more than I was planning on.....but still a consideration. SOOOO charming. The place had SIX fireplaces! Porches, sun rooms and french doors in every room - even an elevator! Its something I could never afford staying here!

Anyway, the hunt is on.

More change is coming...lots of pieces need to fall into place...

I will keep you posted.