Easter

Its Holy Thursday. For my Italian family it all got underway today. The anticipation of getting started was always so exciting - even as back breaking and exhausting as it was. The finished products were always so worth it and such a big hit. What used to be filled with baking and cooking for days - right thru Easter Sunday - is no more. It makes me sad. Empty. I miss my family so much. Its an ache that never leaves me. I miss the chaos, the dysfunction and the madness that we all were. And I miss the love and comfort most of all. My grandmothers recipes sit in an old Savarin can. I cherish them even more because they are all written in her handwriting. But the people who loved all those special, delicious traditions are no longer with us. So I dont bother keeping up with it because its a waste. It doesnt mean anything to anyone anymore. Times have changed. Im having a very hard time adapting to the "new norm". I will be going "down the shore" for the weekend. One of my favorite places. The beach/ocean is my peaceful place. Im hoping it will keep me occupied and not so concentrated on how the holidays are nothing like they used to be. Maybe that will work.